Tuesday, 13 August 2013

Hillbilly Batman saves the day.

Greetings all. It is I, King Longburns, bringing you yet another Batman related comic.
What is this, the fourth time I've posted a Batman comic on here?
I don't even read Batman.

Did you hear that they're making a Batman and Superman movie? I imagine that it will be cool in a special effects and explosions sense. I'm just not sure that it will be a good movie. Basically, I'm expecting it to be a bit stupid. It seems like a cash-in, and let's face it, the match up is a bit imbalanced. I'm not sure what Batman is supposed to do when Superman is flying around punching stuff. I'm also not really sure what Superman does when Batman is doing his thing.
Stand around looking awkward I guess.

Then again, I'm saying this before any information is known about what the film might end up being. For all I know it could be a great film when it's finished, so I should reserve judgement for now. In the interests of diplomacy, of course.

Since I know nothing about the story that this movie will end up having, I shall instead outline some storylines that they could use. I will happily sell these ideas to the producers of said movie if they are interested.

1) Batman is out driving his Bat-Plane when he comes across Superman. They trade carrot cake recipes until they hear on the radio that Lex Luthor has escaped and taken hostages. Also there is a bomb. Superman and Batman then take turns punching Lex Luthor for the rest of the movie.

2) Superman challenges Batman to a race. Superman will run and Batman can use his Batmobile. If Batman loses, Superman will use the kids' club house as his new fortress of solitude/corporate headquarters. Superman wins, but it turns out that the club house was owned by the kindly old Mr. Brick the whole time, who gifts it to the kids.

3) Batman sees Superman and instantly takes a dislike to him. Batman challenges Superman to a boxing contest. When Superman turns up for the contest, Batman isn't there and is instead on TV, calling Superman a sissy.

4) Superman and Batman in an epic drinking contest...  ...to the death.

5) Superman and Batman slash fic.

Anyway, that's all I have for now. Why not try to think up some more yourself? It's a fun game that the whole family can enjoy.

Being the night, or at least the late afternoon,
~King Longburns.