According to a guy called Paul Kelley from Oxford university, requiring people to be at work before ten o'clock in the morning will leave them sleep deprived, and sleep deprivation is a form of torture, therefore requiring people to be at work before ten o'clock in the morning is torture.
And I'm like "right on, man!"
Also, according to a guy called Paul Kelly, Paul Kelly has done literally every available dumb thing, which, as much as it must suck, is actually quite impressive in its thoroughness.
Guilty of a comparatively modest collection of dumb things,
~King Longburns.
